This pandemic thing has been a tough slog. Even though I have the same amount of time (or more) as usual, I haven't felt like doing anything that might be considered productive, including thinking about significance. It is clearly a time in the world at which thinking about significance would likely be good to do, for everyone including me. But, between sickness in our house and a husband who provides an essential service out in the COVID-19 contagion everyday, I think that I have officially entered survival mode. Fight, flight, or freeze -- aren't those the body's instinctual reactions to environmental stress? It looks like "freeze" is my official go-to response.
However, a couple of days back I managed to pull out a book that I started reading ages ago: The Book of Joy. At almost exactly the same time, my fabulous yoga teacher Elizabeth Turner hosted an online class that was focused around the goal of fostering joy during the pandemic. Synchronicity! Okay, this is the universe telling me to buck up and get back at it. And I really need to tell you about The Book of Joy.
This book is essentially the record of a week's worth of conversations between His Holiness the Dalai Lama and Archbishop Desmond Tutu, thoughtfully compiled by Douglas Abrams. In honor of the Dalai Lama's 80th birthday in 2015, Abrams coordinated Desmond Tutu's visit to the Dalai Lama's residence in Dharamsala, India. Prior to the birthday celebrations, the two spiritual leaders (and friends) engaged in a week of semi-structured dialogue about the topic of joy, which Abrams then transcribed and analyzed in The Book of Joy.
The central argument in The Book of Joy is, perhaps predictably, that joy is a fundamental human right and is (or should be) the purpose of human life. Importantly, the concept of joy is not equated with the notion of happiness. Joy "is much bigger than happiness. While happiness is often seen as being dependent on external circumstances, joy is not" (p. 3). Joy is viewed as an enduring state of mind and being that is essential to achieving meaning in life. It is multifaceted and can manifest in myriad ways; an exploration of the aspects of (or requirements for) joy is what comprises the content of the book. The Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu detail the nature of true joy and contemplate obstacles to joy. Most importantly, though, they also identify eight "pillars" of joy, which are discussed in delightfully pragmatic ways and are often supplemented by emergent findings from recent research about joy. The pillars are: (1) perspective, (2) humility, (3) humor, (4) acceptance, (5) forgiveness, (6) gratitude, (7) compassion, and (8) generosity.
Everyone should own this book. Everyone should read this book, multiple times if possible. This book should be required reading on every high school and university syllabus. So, clearly I have strong feelings about it. It is not only the content of the book that's important, but the way that ideas are presented. Despite being authored by two spiritual leaders from exacting religious traditions, the book is not dogmatic in any way. It is secular and accessible from tip to tail; in fact, one of the key messages in the book is how unity among faiths is something that can help us all move forward with joy.
The most immediate takeaway is that it's possible to feel, and maintain, joy during a global pandemic. We can do this! As I read through the book, I continually nodded, smiled, ah-ha-ed, and thought deeply. Much of what was said resonated with what I think I already knew at a visceral level, but much of it was also new learning. Since I've been thinking so much about significance in life, the assertion that resonated the most deeply with me was about purpose. Purpose, say the Dalai Lama and Desmond Tutu, is fundamentally about "how we are able to contribute and be generous to others, how we feel needed by and of value to others" (p. 266). Ah-ha! I have been so deeply focused on internalizing a sense of purpose for myself, when it's actually not about me at all. This is a bit of a mind bender.
I don't want to create a sense that any of what is proposed in The Book of Joy is easy. It's not. In fact, most of it runs directly contrary to our current western thinking about what happiness and joy mean. There's a lot of hard work and commitment implicit in being joyful. But I'm going to do it, or at least give it my best shot.
#significance #significanceproject #thesignificanceproject #joy #happiness #purpose #elizabethturner #joyinpandemic
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